The Number One Thing That Makes Me Insane…

Is living in the country while being married to a man who is allergic to cats.  Why?  Mice.  Big Man and I absolutely pay for pest control service.  Without a doubt.   However, when you own over three acres of land and more than half of that land is heavily wooded, you are bound to have small four-legged visitors from time to time.  Not often, but it is unavoidable.  While this may have little to do with parenting or family, I find that this is an incredibly appropriate topic for my very first post, because it IS The Number One Thing That Makes Me Insane.

We were having a relatively sane evening, the children and I.  Ladybug was doing her daily reading for school, I was grading an exam, and Little Man was happily playing on his own (a small miracle in itself).  Out of the corner of her eye, Ladybug caught sight of The Mouse as it skirted under the china cabinet and immediately alerted me to the situation.  Ewwww.  It’s in the same room with us, I thought to myself.  The next thing I knew, Little Man was sitting in the middle of the dining room table.  I wanted to do the same myself, but how is that setting a good example?  How could I tell him “it’s just a little mouse” if I was sitting beside him in the middle of the table?  I am not usually a girlie girl, until the things that belong outside come inside.  Then, all bets are off.

Since we knew where the little bugger was, I grabbed a flashlight and a recycled deli container, hoping (or not) to catch it.  This may sound crazy, but this approach has actually worked for me before.  When Little Man was a baby and Ladybug was a toddler, there was a mouse in the kids’ playroom.  I kept having visions of Little Man finding the mouse amongst his toys and picking it up to play with it.  Needless to say, I was motivated and caught that mouse.  However, today’s mouse eluded me by hiding under the baseboard heater in the bathroom.  I gave up and did what any girl would do.  I called Big Man at work.  It was almost time for him to come home anyway.

After reminding Big Man that if he ever chooses to go through all of the allergy shots so that we could attempt owning a cat (or several) I would be nothing but supportive, I asked him to stop at the hardware store for a few more mouse traps on his way home and then went about my business.  That’s always my mistake.  As soon as I went to switch the laundry, my little four legged friend came out of the bathroom, followed me to the laundry room and hid under the baseboard heat there.  The little f%$cker startled the heck out of me and I may or may not have spent a minute sitting on top of the washer, planning my next move.  With my feet up.  Why would it follow me?  Isn’t it supposed to run the other way?  There he was.  Next to the dirty laundry.  On the floor.  The dirty laundry that still needed to be picked up and put in the wash.  By me.   Really?  Aren’t you afraid of me?  GO BACK OUTSIDE!

Eventually, Little Man climbed down off of the dining room table, to a chair, with his feet up, and stayed put until Big Man came home.  I made it off the washer and successfully switched the laundry.  The sight of the traps seems to have worked as a cure all for Little Man.  Ladybug was completely unaffected by the whole incident.  I, for one, was very cautious upon using the bathroom near the laundry for the rest of the evening and would be having a drink right now to wash away the heebeejeebees if I didn’t have to go to work tomorrow.  Ughhhhhh.  It’s still here, somewhere.  When I recover from that thought, maybe my next post will be “The Flying Squirrel That Lived Behind the Fish Tank for Two Days” or “The Snake that Woke My Neighbor K Up in the Middle of the Night When Her Husband Was Out of Town.”  Or maybe I’ll just invite one of the neighborhood fisher cats in to hunt The Mouse down.  I love my house.  I love living in the country.  I do.  But I miss the city.  Tonight, more than usual.


PS.  Ever my hero, Big Man did catch the mouse and take it out to the woods, alive unfortunately, but out of my house 🙂


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