Ode to Potty Training

© Prawny | Dreamstime Stock Photos & Stock Free Images

© Prawny | Dreamstime Stock Photos & Stock Free Images

After a particularly trying day of potty training yesterday along with a disappointing visit to the potty clinic where the doctor left me with “Hmmm…he is a mystery….” , I decided I need to do something else besides drink heavily and devour a whole bag of potato chips.  So when frustrated, write a poem!  And that’s what I did.  While enjoying my morning cup of tea, I penned this little ditty.  I hope you enjoy.

Ode to Potty Training

It seems like an easy thing to do
Sitting on the potty and going poo

Just drop your pants and then you sit
That’s all you need to take a s@#$t

No rocket science or math degree
It’s just as simple as going pee

Oh wait, you can’t do that as well?
You’re making my life a living hell

We’ve tried it all and nothing works
You’re driving me and dad berserk

Treats and prizes and charts galore
Did you just s@#$t on my kitchen floor?

You’re running out of underwear
And yet you just dont seem to care

The doctors are all just mystified
And me?  Well I just want to cry.

Ok, deep breath, let’s start again
Mr. Potty can be your best friend

It’s what all big boys have to do
Use the potty to pee and poo

This process is taking an eternity
Do you want to wear diapers at your fraternity?

I know you can do it.  Mom’s got your back
We just have to get you back on track.

So I’ll smile and cheer and give you praise
Even if it takes a thousand more days.

Cuz that’s what we moms have to do
When teaching our little ones how to poo.

Love, Sue

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3 thoughts on “Ode to Potty Training

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